Summer Travels

A summer update in December...
Yea... Sorry about that! Better late than never.

All spring and early summer I prepared for a time of fundraising in Alabama. In late July, I hopped on a MegaBus and started a road trip down the East coast. 
NYC->Harrisburg, PA->Washington, DC->Atlanta->Sweet Home Alabama.
I had a great time reuniting with some of the best of friends I have made in YWAM and seeing family that I've missed. Highlights being authentic Korean food, lots of Dutch Blitz (a card game), and being in a worship set led by Sean Feucht. If you haven't heard his latest CD, stop now and go listen to it. 

So... fundraising. All I can say is God is good! My inclination that it was going to be easy wasn't just wishful thinking. Because of the prayer support I had and the countless hours of work previously put in, I had people actually propose supporting me versus me asking them. Such an encouragement! I gained a whopping 7 supporters in this time, bringing me to just over $400 a month. I was also able to raise around $1,000 through one-time donations and a fundraiser, which helped me to pay off some of the debt that I owe YWAM. No, I did not reach my $1,000 a month goal, but that would be almost impossible in just over two weeks. This walk is a journey, and I must tread on. $1,000 here I come! To those that prayed with me through that time and to those that have committed to prayerfully or financially support me, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart! You are making my ministry possible, and I'm so grateful that God has brought us together for such a time as this.

Vancouver 

At Cultus Lake with Lauren

Top Pot Doughnuts

After an intense spring/summer of fundraising, God blessed me with an incredible vacation. I often hear, "You travel all the time, what do you mean you haven't had a vacation in awhile." I assure you, traveling in missions IS NOT a vacation. For the first time in awhile, I went somewhere new with no other purpose than to enjoy myself. It was so refreshing and so needed. I spent 7 glorious days with my good friend Lauren in British Columbia, Canada. I spent a day in Seattle, Washington eating Top Pot doughnuts, enjoying a beverage from the first ever Starbucks, watching the fish being thrown at Pike Place Market, and, of course, the Space Needle. I saw Lauren's hometown, Abbotsford, and the surrounding area with all of its lakes and mini mountains. I spent a day in the city of Vancouver and I swear it is the prettiest one there is (that I've seen anyways). I went up to Whistler (where the Olympics were held) to share in her family's vacation. While all the things I saw and did were fabulous, the best part was getting to for-real hug, not skype-hug, one of my favorite people in the world, it was experiencing amazing hospitality from a family that had never even met me, and it was receiving the blessings that only a friendship that is founded in the Lord can give.     

                                                   

On top of Blackcomb Mountain in Whistler

The spring and summer of 2012 was definitely one of the hardest in my life, but God is so faithful to bring us out of the refining trials safe and sound and better off than we were before. God is showing me just how much I can trust Him and how dedicated He is to making me more like Him. He is a God that chases us. And we are so undeserving. Although I look back at the spring and summer of 2012 and automatically think "Fundraising!", that's not really what it was all about. It was about God loving me, chasing me, restoring me. I think that's what it always comes back to. Although this song is overplayed at this point, the lyrics still ring true...

"Higher than the mountains that I face
Stronger than the power of the grave
Constant through the trial and the change
One thing remains
Your love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me"

A Long, Hard Road

Wow. That's really all I can muster when thinking of this year.
How can you be a completely different person than you were 6 months ago? Heck, 2 months ago? I am, and I can only give credit to God. It was a long time coming, it has definitely been a process, but you don't see it then. You don't feel it. If you did, it'd be like watching a tornado in the distance, slowly making its way towards you. It's actually barreling towards you, ripping things apart, quickly bringing about upheaval, causing soul bearing fear. Yea that's what it's been like for me. But only in retrospect. In the moment, it just seemed hard. A dull ache that you never quite forget about. A dull ache versus a tornado...yea God is good like that. Ohhh His sweet grace for any situation.

I can say with confidence I'm finally becoming the person I've always wanted to be. Disciplined, forgiving, eager to put others ahead of me. I'm in no way saying I'm perfect, or even good at these things, but what I am saying is that I'm trying. Diligently. Not just for a week or two, but with no end in sight. I feel as if a burden has been lifted. We fight ourselves a lot, declaring we know best. But every time I give up a little of me, and replace it with a Godly principle that seems like absurdity, something clicks. And I change. And then it makes perfect sense. In that order. God is always turning absurdity into sense. We just have to let Him I guess.

He's changing my heart about Alabama too. It seems odd. I've been runnin from that place for a mighty long time. I s'pose for me it's been a zooming out to get the whole picture kind of deal. I had to run up the hill so I could look down and take it all in. Maybe that's why I liked being on top of the Empire State Building so much. I needed to get the big picture so that I could understand the pieces of the city when I was back down on the sidewalks. I've come to realize that no place alone will make you happy. New York City will only make me happy if there are good people involved and an a-ok from God. And even then, I'll still miss things from Alabama. And from Israel. And from Mexico. And from every place that has been a part in making me who I am today. I thought that I'd find a place that would just feel like home. But I won't. Because no where on Earth will be home to me. I can't have everything I love about every place I've been to in one locale. I'll learn to love new things in my present whereabouts and I'll appreciate the things I love from the places of my past, and maybe even incorporate them in, creating a unique home that is a display of all God has shown me, blessed me with. I couldn't really ask for better than that.

I'll always miss someone. I'll always miss a certain food. I'll always miss this and that. I'll always dream of what it'd be like to live somewhere else. I'll always have the desire to go. But more than that I just have the desire for family. My own, specifically. So that no matter where I am, who I'm missing, where I'm dreaming of going, I'll have a home. And I think God is preparing me for that. This change, this bettering, it's all leading to something bigger than myself. This road is long and hard and it's summer in the South. The heat's a'risin off the blacktop and you're sweatin' just lookin' at it. But only that road can get you where you need to go. So, you simply start walkin'. You see, this change ain't for you.

Re-entry

It happens every time. You leave, you come back, and you're never the same. I know this as I go, but until the change is staring you in the face you just can't fully grasp its reality.
The night I sat in an internet cafe in Bangkok writing my last post seems such a distant memory. Did I really travel around Southeast Asia for over a month? Did I really hold beautiful newborns in the slums of Cambodia? Did I really hang out in strip clubs in the Red Light District with a well known anti-human trafficking organization? It seems so bizarre to say that I did. And it was only a month or so ago.
I was anticipating coming home to the good ol' USA like a child awaiting summer vacation on the last day of school. I knew that, once back, I would fall back into routine. I would forget about those girls that were trapped. I'd forget about the horrid poverty. I'd forget. And I wanted to. I was tired. My mind was tired. I wanted to be uninformed. Ignorance is bliss, so they say.
Our DTS had one final week once back here in NY. We caught up with the other team upon their arrival and tried to share our experiences. But no words, no slideshow of photos can truly portray those moments and do them justice. We all tried to pretend that our time wasn't coming to a fleeting end, that our 6 month bubble wasn't about to be popped. We graduated our students with pride on March 10th and by the 11th we'd said most of our goodbyes. My mind knew that this was what they were made for, to go back to their homes and change the world, but my heart was in a state of utter confusion. Why was my family leaving? It's the hardest part about this lifestyle. 6 months in YWAM equals at least a few years in "real time", I'm convinced. This, this I didn't want to forget. I wanted every last memory with those that I had loved in a way I never had before.
Time dragged on, and then just got on with itself as it normally does. It's been just 1 month and 1 week since that whirlwind period of my life ended, but it seems as if it's been an eternity. I go to work 9-5 like a normal person. I cook for 1, instead of 50, like a normal person. I have coffee with friends, I read quietly in the back yard, the list goes on. Drastic change in such a short time is nothing short of dramatic, and sometimes even traumatic. They say time heals all things, but really I think it just numbs it and covers it up.
Our minds are quite nice in that they completely allow us to take a hiatus from reality. But all hiatuses must, they need, to come to an end. The feeling of helplessness as you watch a 15 year old dance her life away seeps back into your thoughts and you realize you haven't been the same since you witnessed it with your own eyes. Your mind has been in some abyss, but your heart and your being hasn't. You have forever been altered. Thank God. It's in those moments that people become better. Just plain better.
So now as I live my post-DTS life, I grapple with this new knowledge, this change in my person. But even more, I grapple with knowing that I'll repeat this process in 5 short months. I fully know that God calls us to things so big that if it weren't for Him, we'd fall short. It's in those calls that we can take no credit and He gets all the glory. This has undoubtedly been one of those times. I'll keep dreaming big, because the change that comes from it compares to no other.

DTS 2011-2012 Graduating Class + Staff

Reflections

Here I sit at an internet cafe in Bangkok, Thailand, killing time before I jump into an airplane, saying goodbye to Asia, possibly for good. This outreach in Thailand has been such a whirlwind. I have so many mixed emotions. I'll be honest and say that hard is the first word that comes to mind. This trip wasn't exactly an easy one for many different reasons. The ministry itself was difficult. Working in the Red Light District was exhausting. Thailand has a heavy air about it anyways because of the Budhism, but it is especially heavy in the RLD. The last night I was there I was able to go into a bar and see what was going on. My heart broke. Men my grandfather's age buying 2 girls at a time for the night. Men obnoxiously drunk and the girls catering to their every need. Girls praying to the mini Buddhist temple for many customers that night so that they could make a lot of money. It reeks of darkness and deception.
It has also just been hard for me personally. The weight of our ministry added to my own personal problems was a lot to bear simply because this wasn't a time for me to focus on me. But God is always teaching us something, and why not on an outreach whether I'm staff or not. Still owing outreach money has not been easy. It's always lurking in the back of your mind. I know God has a tendency to make you wait til the very last minute for some things, but I guess I forget that when it is actually me faced with the big problem. I have raised quite a bit of money, and I am so grateful for those that have deemed my cause worthy to be supported. I still like about $1,000. It has to be turned in in about a day, so that's a little nerve racking, but God has been teaching me to stop being negative and expect His provision. So, I will say that I know God is working in the hearts of those that He wishes to partner with me. I also feel as if the enemy has been trying to isolate me, making me feel very alone and that not many people care. I feel like this is a common occurence for those that are on the mission field. I am an external processor and the person I share everything with isn't with me, so I've kept everything bottled in. God has been good in giving me others that I can share some things with, easing the burden, and I am thankful for them. I was sick for about 10 days, so that really didn't help things at all. A few antibiotics later and I am good as new. I reached a point where I really felt everything was coming together and that God was giving me the strength and endurance to really embrace this outreach. After this, I received another blow. Someone came into the room where we were staying and stole my DSLR camera. What makes this so hard is that we were staying at a YWAM base, and I know that the person was Christian. Unfortunately, expensive material goods can be a temptation here because a lot of people come from poor families. I am absolutely devasted. My camera is my most prized possession. I'm not sure what good God will bring from this situation, but I have to believe that He will. I can only pray for this person, that they will be convicted and give it back. I was hoping it would happen before I left, but the clock is ticking.
Right now, I'm at a difficult point in my life, in the area of what God is teaching me. They are hard things, but I am grateful. I will be so much better off in the long run. If this is what it takes, then so be it. I have to be positive, I have to believe God is who He says He is, and that He will do what He says He will do. God is good despite our circumstances. Although the things I'm being ridden of are hard, God evens it out with the amazingness of the life I'm currently leading.
If you are reading this please say a prayer for me; for my finances, for me getting my camera back, that I will trust God in everything, and that I will perservere with courage as God strengthens my relationship with Him.

Cambodia: Take 2/ Thailand: Take 1

My time in Cambodia has come and gone! My team and I left Phnom Penh Sunday night, and I now find myself in Bangkok, Thailand. The last week of outreach in the city of  Phnom Penh was an excelllent time. We continued feeding the children in the slums with the Irish couple (John and Ann). 2 other days we were able to go to the slums and give the kids a good scrub. They rarely ever take baths, so it's nice to see them squeaky clean.  It's very hard to teach them about hygiene, so a lot of the kids are sickly. There were 2 babies born just in the 2 weeks I was there, so I hope and pray that someone is able to educate them so that they can have a better quality of life.
We also worked with a local pastor and his wife that has a small church in their home. This couple is amazing. They started adopting Cambodian children and vowed not to stop until they couldn't afford to adopt anymore. They are currently taking care of 20 children! Please be in prayer for them because a lot of the children have been very sick. One of the boys was just diagnosed with Typhoid.
The couple run a feeding program every Friday for poor children in a local community. We were able to help them with this. We played games with the kids, fed them, and prayed for them. Also, the boys on my team painted the room they use for their church.
The remainder of our our time was spent teaching English and doing prayer walks in the Red Light District of the city. This is an area heavily hit with prostitution, and we simply wanted to bring light into the darkness of that place.
Now that we are in Thailand, we are going to be working with a lot of prostitution/trafficking situations. Today, we prayer walked the area that we will be working in; it was one of the heaveiest places I've ever been. Thailand is known all over the world for its Red Light District; want cheap sex and a beautiful Asian girl to "make all your dreams come true", then come to Thailand. If you've never been here it's hard to imagine. In the US, there is prostitution, strip clubs, etc, but this is a whole new ballgame. It's kept somewhat secret, but here, no no no. It has brightly shining neon lights welcoming you to its grips with absolutely no shame. You don't see English very often in the city of Bangkok...until you enter Nana, the Red Light District. It is catered to the Westerner; everything written in English, American music blaring from the bars, all Western type foods and drinks. You take one look at the men and know exactly what they are there for. Aging men that have lost themselves somewhere in their lives and are now searching to fill the void by satisfying temporary pleasures. How did they ever get to this point in their life? I don't know how a person comes to the place that they are capable
of lying to themselves so deeply that flying half way across the world to take advantage of young Asian girls is considered normal and morally sound. If I didn't know Jesus I'd say there is no hope for them or this world.
Tomorrow will be our first day working with a well known anti trafficking minstry. We will be doing outreaches into the bars and actually talking to these girls that are being prostituted. I am BEYOND excited; I'm finally getting a hands on experience in this minstry. Please keep my team and I in your prayers as it is a very difficult ministry to work in. The realities of it break your heart and leave you wounded beyond words. We should all think seriously when we sing "break my heart for what breaks yours".
Also, continue praying for my finances for this trip. The amount needed has dropped slightly to $1,336. If you are reading this please, please consider giving to me and the ministry I'm pursueing. I literally cannot raise this money without you. Even if you can only give $10, it helps! No gift is too small. The money is past due, so please donate now if you can. If you'd like information on how to give, simply click the tab titled "donation info" at the top of this page. Once again, thank you to those that have given! You have blessed me beyond words!

Cambodia: Take 1

It's been just over a week since I placed my feet on Cambodian soil, yet it feels like much longer. I honestly had no idea what to expect my time here to look like, but God has given me a lot of nice surprises. We are staying at a Christian church/school and our accommodations are so nice! I share a room with 2 other girls. We have our own bathroom!! And it's not a squattypotty :) The whole team is staying on the same floor, and we have our own common area where we eat our meals, play a lot of intense card games, and just spend time with another.

As far as ministry goes, we do most of our work here at the school. We have all taken on the role of teacher. We are teaching English to preschool-6th grade children. I helped teach preschoolers for a few days, but now I have the 6th graders, which is something I thought I'd never say. In the afternoon, the school provides English classes for anyone in the community. I am teaching the level 4 students, which consists mostly of university students, but a few younger ones that are already super good at English.

For the last few years, teaching English in another country is something I've been really interested in, and I'm so blessed to have gotten the chance without really even asking God for it. It can be really difficult because I usually don't have a translator, but for the most part everything is good. The 6th graders teach me patience and my level 4 students teach me about Cambodia. Conversation is one of the best ways to improve your language skills, so it's fun teaching them, but learning so much more in return. One fun fact I've learned: Cambodians love to watch Tom and Jerry! haha What can I say, I do too.

1 month old baby that's living in the slums.

Yesterday, we went to the slums of Phnom Penh with an Irish couple that are permanent missionaries here in Cambodia. They feed the children there twice a week, and they also help with bringing in medical care for them if the need be. They have saved a few children's lives and it was such a blessing to see their work here. We are going to work with them a few more times next week, but I'm not sure what it will look like yet.

We have also been doing some prayer walking around our neighborhood and other large areas of Phnom Penh. This place is gripped with corruption and poverty like most poor countries are, but we believe that God wants to do something in this place. I think most people are unaware, but Cambodia's history is full of war and genocide. This country is still recovering from a civil war. The Khmer Rouge tried taking control of the country by killing anyone that was politically opposed to them, educated people including all teachers and doctors, Christians, etc etc. This went on for years and you can still see the effects. Slowly, but surely Cambodians are rising up again. Most of the population is under the age of 30, so new mindsets are being formed in this impressionable age group. This is such a perfect opportunity to bring Christianity to the people! Although the Khmer Rouge wiped out most Christians, they are coming back strong. Only 2% here are Christians, but it's only been about 40 years since the killing ended, so that's a pretty good number. Religion here is dominated by Buddhism, with a little bit of Hinduism mixed in, which means that they think completely different from us. It takes time to introduce new concepts to people, but luckily with freedom of religion here, there is plenty of opportunities to do just this. 

I have only one week left here in Cambodia, and then it is off to Thailand. Outreach is flying by! It is always a blessing to be introduced to new cultures and people, and I'm enjoying every minute of it. Doing what you know God has called you to do is always exciting and forever rewarding! If you have any questions about my time here, or if you have the desire to partner with me on my journey through Asia, then please contact me via email: stephcook87@gmail.com. My need has dropped from $2,000 to $1,486, so keep those prayers coming! Please consider being a part of that answered prayer! Simply click on the "Donation Info" tab at the top to find out how. A big thank you to all of those that have already partnered with me in prayer or financially! I couldn't do it without you!!

Outreach to Washington DC

After spending less than 24 hours in Washington DC back in August, I knew I loved the city. What I didn't know was when I'd have the chance to see more than just the American History Museum. Fate was on my side, and I was back in DC to start our DTS outreach. Our time there was nothing short of amazing. The people, the places, the presence of God...well it was some of the best I've ever experienced. When you leave a place, and after only 2 weeks of being there they feel like your family, you know it was a good experience. We dedicated our time to the YWAM'ers there, led by Jason Hershey and his family. Their heart's cry is for the ending of abortion. We stood at the steps of the Supreme court with red tape on our mouths declaring LIFE, we pleaded with those in
 Heaven in the wee hours of the morning for the ending of the taking of innocent lives, and we kept a 24 hour prayer watch for 12 consecutive days to move God's heart to move the hearts of those in earthly power. Simply put, it was powerful. I've never received such hope in my life. God CAN change America. God WILL change America. BUT America will only be changed if there is a people willing to pray.
Seeing the monuments there was life changing for me when it comes to hope for my nation. No matter how immoral this nation becomes, those monuments with the Word of God written on them, will remain standing. The men who gave definition to this country will always be there testifying the goodness of God.
Jason and his family have been aspiring to start a 24/7 house of prayer in DC, and we were so lucky to be there to physically establish it with him. It is located in the roughest area of DC. Across the river, there is a place called Anacostia. A place that a lot of people who live in DC have never even been. A place ridden with crime, drugs and alcohol, and intolerance, but most importantly, a place ridden with hopelessness, despair, and a roughness only gained through the hard knock life. Thank God that our God is a God of redemption and restoration; a God that uses the weak to lead the strong. God is using Anacostia to change DC, and subsequently America. I love that God chose to birth this prayer house in a place that most wouldn't dare declare worthy. Jesus sees the value in everyone and everything. Taking the broken and making them whole is His specialty. Thank God because I wouldn't be sitting here writing this today if not.

The outreach ended on a rainy Monday afternoon, but the weather could not stop the event that culminated our time in DC, the March for Life. Thousands upon thousands of people gathered together to march down the streets of DC declaring that a person is a person no matter how small (kudos to Dr. Sues). After praying and worshiping for the ending of abortion with no more than 50 people at a time, it was so encouraging to see that we are not alone. People are willing to travel for miles and miles to declare that they are not okay with babies being murdered. I have to admit that before coming to DC, I knew I was pro-life, but that was the extent of my convictions. I don't think you can spend too much time around the Hershey's and stay that way. Now I wear a red band on my wrist that might just simply say "LIFE", but it's something that provokes me to pray for the ending of abortion every time it catches my eye. Thank God for opening my eyes to His heart on this issue.

Jason, his family, and the YWAM staff there were so inspirational. Their hearts are only for the Lord, and that's refreshing. We were also able to serve with a team from Kona, HI. Actually, it was the same DTS that I did there: Community Transformations. Being able to make even more new friends and serve along side them was just the cherry on top of an amazing outreach experience. Of all the places I've been, Washington DC is by far one of my favorites. Its people, its atmosphere, it has captured my heart, and I know that we will be seeing each other as often as God allows.